Have you ever had the thought, "This is not supposed to be my life!" Have you ever spent hours, weeks, months, even years working and toiling toward a dream for your life that despite your best efforts just won't materialize? Do you ever think, "Where did I go wrong?"
God and I have been working through some of these questions over the past two years. In giving up my full-time teaching position when my husband was appointed to another church, I never dreamed that I would have any trouble finding another position. And yet, two years later, doors have not opened. I have questioned myself, questioned my abilities, questioned my purpose and have struggled to develop some sort of clear concise plan for my future. At the age of 35 I find myself asking/screaming, "What am I supposed to do with my life?" And the answer that I come to is this. What I'm doing now is exactly what I'm supposed to be doing. Look at this quote from author, Beth Moore:
Satan definitely wants to force us off our property and make us feel like we're getting nowhere. But God has given us the privilege of standing in the victorious space He desires for us. (Paul: A Journey of Faith)
When I look at my life, I realize that God has used this time to do some good work in my soul. He's taught me what it means to surrender, to trust, to truly depend on him. Because I'm not teaching full-time I have had the opportunity to spend quality time with my children, to help start a community theater in our area, to write and to engage in Bible study and time with God. It's been good, and it brings me joy. Even though my professional life may not look the way I think it should, I can trust that God has placed me where he wants me for his victory. And, as a child of God, his victory is mine.
Whenever you doubt yourself. Whenever you feel you're not good enough, you're not doing enough, you're not fulfilling your potential, remember; God has placed you in a place of VICTORY!!
Now this I know:
The Lord gives victory to his anointed.
He answers him from his heavenly sanctuary
with the victorious power of his right hand.
The Lord gives victory to his anointed.
He answers him from his heavenly sanctuary
with the victorious power of his right hand.
Psalm 20:6
Blessings and Peace,
Sara
Awesome post! Thank you for sharing. I know exactly how you feel as I've been in a similar position for almost 3 years now.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Tina! I think sometimes that God doesn't so much move in our lives as just sits on us! :-) You are doing fabulous work, however, with Alpacas for Autism.
ReplyDeleteI think we all ask the question of our purpose many times throughout our lives. I love the answer God gives us in Ephesians - Moreover, because of what Christ has done, we have become gifts to God that he delights in, for as part of God's sovereign plan we were chosen from the beginning to be his, and all things happen just as he decided long ago. God's purpose in this was that we should praise God and give glory to him for doing these mighty things for us, who were the first to trust in Christ. Ephesians 1:11,12
ReplyDeleteI think we have 2 purposes in life - to receive God's love, and share His love with others. :)
I like that, BFM. It's very simple when you look at it from that perspective! :-) I also like that Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the planS (plural) I have for you..."
ReplyDeleteThanks for your honesty as you share about your frustration of not finding another teaching position. I had a friend from church over today and she talked about being restless and wondering where she's supposed to be. I'm going to forward this link to her.
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