Friday, April 30, 2010

Confession 97: Stuck

I've been job hunting recently in lieu of our upcoming move. I have to say, and forgive my lack of eloquence, job hunting SUCKS!! I'm not sure how much more my self-esteem can take!! I don't know about other states, but the economic crisis is just now hitting the education system here in Missouri. Kansas City laid off over 300 teachers, and other districts in the surrounding area are having to get rid of positions as well. As we're moving about an hour or so outside of Kansas City, this is not a good sign.

I've put in three applications for teaching positions and only had one interview. I've contacted principals within a forty mile radius of where we're moving, only to find that there are just no English positions to be had out there. And, I'm also discovering that I'm not really qualified to do anything else--or so it seems to me. My Master's degree is in Christian Education which prevents me from doing much other than teaching, but prevents me from getting teaching jobs because school districts would have to pay me more than a new teacher fresh out of undergrad.

God keeps speaking to me about faith through Bible study, friends and family. He must think I have a lot, or else something would have opened up by now. :-) It's so hard to look into the future and see nothing coming together!! It's not that I think things won't work out, per se, because I know they will. It's just the waiting and wondering that makes it hard to breathe sometimes. Jeremiah 29:11 keeps going through my mind--God has a plan and purpose and he will see it through.

God will also forgive me for snapping at my husband, yelling at my kids, and plopping my pretty red-headed with a temper to go with it boy down on the floor to scream for awhile while I went to lay down for a few minutes. :-) Luckily, he's 22 months and won't remember this incident at all, while I will take it with me to my grave, I am sure.

Anyway, the moral of all this is that, although God has been shutting a lot of doors lately, he will eventually open a window. The question is whether or not I will be able to fit through it!!

Blessings and Peace,
Sara

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