Confession 76: Not Another Openly Christian, Christian!

My husband and I were watching American Idol last night, one of my guilty pleasures, and a worship pastor, married with three kids, came to audition. Avaril Lavegne was the guest-judge, complete in a little devil-hooded hoodie. The pastor performed his audition piece, an original song he had written in honor of his wife. He had a wonderful voice and presence--deep, scratchy, rock vocals. He seemed to be everything American Idol looks for in a contestant. I thought he was a shoe-in for Hollywood, until Avaril started to speak. "It's really hard to be a pop star and have a family and kids. You're gone all the time. You never see them." (paraphrasing a bit here) She then went on to tell him that with being a pastor and having children that she didn't think he could do it all, and that she was not going to vote him through. The other judges murmured their agreement and the final vote was up to Kara, who seemed to be leaning in Avaril's direction.

WHAT?! An Idol judge is suddenly concerned about someone's family and career? Are you kidding me? They're supposed to be judging the quality of the voice not the life. Of course, anyone who watches T.V. knows it's really all about the story. You have to sell the person, not the singer. And who would appeal to middle-class Americans more than a lovable working father grasping for his dream? Don't give me this "it's too hard on your family" crap. How many single parents have been on Idol over the years? Does anyone remember Fantasia? And what's this junk about not being able to have a career and be on the show? Do you think it was easy for an oil rigger to go on Idol week after week? Or how about a Marine? Or a teacher? Or a single mom working two jobs to support her disabled child? No, the judges did not balk at this contestant because he was a working father, they balked because he was a (whisper) Christian.

If there's one thing network T.V. doesn't want, it's an openly Christian, Christian. It's fine for reality show contestants to talk about their faith. It makes them likable. They seem more wholesome, "good". They can even go so far as to use the word God and sweetly speak of their younger years spent singing in front of their home congregations. But please, don't mention Jesus. It's too overtly Christian to openly follow Christ, and a worship pastor most certainly openly follows Christ. And let's not use the word "pastor". It's a bit off-putting. Too staunchy and strict. No fun. We could sell a youth leader or song leader, but a pastor is just a bit too much. Don't you agree?

It blows my mind that a show which could produce Adam Lambert would be uncomfortable with a pastor. But, maybe I shouldn't be. I mean, Adam Lambert is everything American's love, right? Outspoken, flamboyent, overtly sexual, pushing the boundaries of what is "acceptable", shocking, but not Marilyn Manson-like. A male counterpart to Lady Gaga, perhaps.

I don't mean to come across as self-righteous. That's a distinctly Christian trait I can't stand. It's just that I get tired of this perception that Christians are unacceptable. Most of us are just trying to show God's love to a world in need. We want to reach out, to bring hope, to care for the world and those who dwell within. And I don't like double-standards. If the judges don't want an open Christian on their show, fine. But say that. Don't be hypocritical about it. Isn't that what Christians are supposed to do? :-)

Blessings and Peace,
Sara

Confession 75: Trust and Obey... Is There No Other Way?

Lately, I've been working through a Bible study on the book of Philippeans entitled Becoming a Woman of Peace by Elizabeth George. When I picked it up, I thought it would be a message of perseverance, yet God has been leading me down another path in this study--the path of obedience. Whenever I hear the word obedience, I just cringe inside. It's like taking cough medicine, I have to choke it down. Obedience is not something that comes naturally to me. On a grand scale, I'm an American. Fierce independence has been tilled into our very soil. Second, I'm a Midwestern girl. Midwesterners don't take anything at face value. We work too hard and, quite literally, "weather" too much. It's no accident that Missouri is called the "Show-Me State". Third, I was raised to be an independent thinker. My parents encouraged me to have opinions and to make decisions on my own. In short, I don't like being told what to do.

The problem is that as a Christian, that is exactly what I'm supposed to do. God speaks, I listen and say, "Yes, Sir!" God doesn't want stubborn independence, but humble submission. As a Christian, I am called to be dependent--on God. And God has been reminding me of that a lot lately. Even in school. My English IV students just finished reading Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew. In this play, violently independent Kate must learn submission to live peaceably with her demanding husband, Petruchio. In the end, Kate publicly chastises independent women, reminding them that their husbands work hard to provide for them, love them, care for them and protect them. In return, a husband should be given the gift of obedience by his wife. You can imagine the discussions we had about that!!

But, essentially, that is the same attitude we as Christians should have for God. God is our creator, our sustainor, our provider and protector. God loves us above all else, sacrificing even his own son for our redemption. And what we are asked of in return is love, trust, and obedience. It shouldn't be hard, but it's one of the hardest things we're called to do. First, in order to obey, we have to trust in God's goodness and faithfulness. And when you see a dark road looming ahead, that's hard to do. It's that leap of faith. The world screams at us not to jump, tells us not to be foolish, entreats us to hold on tight to what we know, even if it's not in our best interest. Yet in the midst of that is the calm voice of God, hearkening us to listen through the noise, assuring us that when we leap, he will give us wings to fly.

I know all of this. Heck, I've even experienced it several times in my life. And the results were truly God-driven. I quit my job, moved to a distant city, went to seminary for a degree I never thought I wanted and met the love of my life. God pushed me there and I obeyed. To steal a line from Robert Frost, "that has made all the difference".

Yet here I am, five years later, standing on the cusp of faith, doubting, rebelling, digging in my heels. And so God is calling out again. "Trust and obey, for there's no other way..." Humble obedience. Paul writes in Philippeans of finishing a great race. And while he does speak of perseverance, the overall message is one of submission. Submit yourself to God, focus on God. Forget the past, push forward to the goal. Count all as loss for the gain of Christ. Just obey. Just obey.

Blessings and Peace,
Sara

Confession 74: Thanks, Mom!

My mom came down to help me with the boys this past week while my husband was away at a conference. One of the wonderful things about my mom is that she is a MOM. When something needs to be done, she just jumps in and does it. Poopy diaper, let's go change it. Getting Garrett dressed, clothes are ready to go. Need some coffee, already brewing. Dinnertime, on the table. Lunch is made the night before, clothes are folded, dishes are done, floors are swept and kids are bathed. Spoiled? Completely. But sometimes, I need that. Maybe it's being one of two girls growing up. Parents tend to respond differently to daughters than sons. My sister and I have always been Mommy and Daddy's girls. But it's more than that. My parents and I have a deep and meaningful relationship. And although they will always do whatever they can for me, they know that my sister and I both love them and respect them. There is nothing I wouldn't do for my parents, and I am truly grateful for the love and support they show to me.

I think if I can be half of the mom my mom is to me, my boys will be in pretty good shape!

Blessings and Peace,
Sara